this HOLY rodeo! is America’s first fully corporate music venture in the form of a hyperactive and theatrical four-piece freak rock band. Combining the funds of Exxon-Mobil and the military know-how of Lockheed Martin, they have rejected their past independent tendencies in favor of a brand new model that they call “Dependent Music”, which requires the ‘artist’ to rely entirely on the backing of shadowy multinational conglomerates without an ounce of integrity or artistic merit, while perfectly synthesizing modern musical trends in search of the most widely-appealing product possible.

Brought to life via the efforts of four very well-adjusted young gentlemen in New York City (Mario Marques on bass, Chris Harth on vocals, Sami Habib on guitar, and Gaetano Lardieri on drums), they have recently entered a new militant era in their quest for world domination. After being recruited via TikTok ads by the shadowy mercenary group ‘The Breeders’, the band has chronicled their methods in the song, “the march of the breeders descends upon manhattan!”, which dropped April 16th. Member Sami Habib has risen quickly through the ranks and has documented his experiences on this HOLY rodeo!’s social media.

Their multi-faceted and over-the-top stage show has been praised by Beyond the Stage magazine as “...electric and eccentric…” and their music has been described as “...What the fuck?...the most unique tracks we’ve heard all year,” by Havoc Underground, and “Bursting with creative rock flair…” by Obscure Sound. Many others have even gone as far as to say they have a direct psychic channel to a primordial deity who feeds them all of their ideas and helps with hair and makeup (citation needed).

Currently sporting their newest single “the march of the breeders descends upon manhattan!”, it features blaring fax machine synths, boisterous army chants, various ornithological phenomena, classic funk-inspired drum and bass grooves, and unyielding paranoid vocal confabulations. They have also tentatively announced they are in talks to own the Suez Canal and at least 70% of the world’s production of ethanol. You can support their efforts online and in person, as their checks from BlackRock oddly have yet to clear.